About this Episode:
Episode Transcript:
Kenzie Tartaglione:
Hello everybody! It’s Kenzie here. Thank you all so much for listening to our show! We are very excited to announce a little update… our first pieces of merch! If you head over to our website, queerpg.com, you can check out all our new stuff! We have queeRPG logo stickers and pins, AND something fun for season one. We have Wildmoore High Wyverns notebooks. They come in three different designs so head on over there to check it out! We are selling these through Society6 so if you go to our website, under the shop tab, you’ll see the notebook. Clicking on it will redirect you so that you can purchase! Again, thank you guys so much for your support and enjoy the episode!
The content warning for this episode includes addiction, physical violence, abstract mention of an eating disorder, implied child death, and non-graphic descriptions of dead bodies..
Kenzie (MC):
Ivy the night after, or the same night of family secrets imploding and seeing the heart of Wildmoore for the first time, you walk all the way back to Wildmoore with Kai by your side. All the way to Blackthorn Manor. And I think as you go to open the front door, your hand kinda still apprehensive at what you’d find inside. And whatever Kai was meant to do, wherever she was going to be hanging out, there’s probably a little bit of a hope that night that should would do it from a distance. It felt like the conversation you were having with our dads was just going around in circle for hours. You desperate for the truth. Bast flipping back and forth between saying it was him and saying it wasn’t. Your stoic father, for on the first time’s you ever seen him like this, unnerved. Gabriel unable to bridge any obvious gap in communication that was happening.
The state of both of your fathers in that moment was jarring. They had never presented to you anything other than confidence but that was really hard to care about when everything else was kinda crumbling around you. You guys are in the sitting room. And Bast is standing up pacing. And at one point, Gabriel reaches out and he says,
Kenzie (Gabriel Duncan):
Mi amor, please calm down.
Kenzie (MC):
And Bast turns around and just snaps and says,
Kenzie (Bast Duncan):
Drop the affectation, Gabriel. I’m about sick of it.
Kenzie (MC):
And there’s a sharp intake of breath from Gabriel and he says,
Kenzie (Gabriel):
Excuse me?
Kenzie (MC):
There’s a tone of offense in his voice, his eyes dart between you and Bast and he continues saying,
Kenzie (Gabriel):
I think it may be a little too late for that.
Kenzie (MC):
And Bast returns,
Kenzie (Bast):
In this house then. Drop it.
Kenzie (MC):
And Gabriel says,
Kenzie (Gabriel):
Bambolina, please, don’t be upset with me. This wasn’t a lie. It was a long ago joke that was taken too far.
Kenzie (MC):
And the thick Italian accent your dad had, disappears into a mishmash of accents that can’t be placed.
April Consalo:
Ivy has gone through so many emotions over the course of this fight, this discussion. At one point she broke down in tears but those have long since rung dry. And this revelation, this betrayal, even though it isn’t’ that consequential, is enough to rock her back. Because ever since she was born, the lilting tone of her dad, calling her home into the house. On the phone. Ringing up into her bedroom. Even that is a lie.
April (Ivy):
Why would I be angry? Just fits with everything else I’ve been finding out about you guys.
Kenzie (Gabriel):
I promise that I did – that was once how I sounded. But I lived in so many places and I’ve lived here for over two hundred years now. It was a joke that Bast – a dare that we made with friends at the beginning of this all. And it was so funny to keep it going and then it felt more natural to me anyway that it was easy to keep.
April:
Ivy looks between her fathers, looks at her tall. Confident, strong father who is now riddled with anxiety and irritation. Bast was always the patient one. Always the one who’s hands would bandage her skinned knees with precision. One who’s face she could look to and feel like she didn’t have to cry. She looks at Gabirel who always made her laugh and filled her with lightness and who even his posture seems to change with this revelation. He looks so much older and looking between the two for them millennias old. Each of them having lived through many
millennia, against her fifteen almost sixteen years. And she feels so small. But then again I feel like so powerful, and angry, and new.April (Ivy):
So, was any of this true? The way that you raised me. The secrecy that I had to live with. The shame of it all. Did you do it dad?
Kenzie (MC):
Gabriel and Bast look at one another and you can see that they’re saying something, just people who’ve known each other for so long, talking without speaking. And Gabriel says,
Kenzie (Gabriel):
There is so much about it that –
Kenzie (MC):
And Bast cuts him off and says,
Kenzie (Bast):
Yes.
April:
Even when she heard it from Adam it didn’t hit her the way this hits her. But she manages to keep her face still.
April (Ivy):
And… why?
Kenzie (Bast):
I’m going to start with something that doesn’t sound like a direct answer, but I will get to the direct answer. Is that okay?
April (Ivy):
Yeah, that’s fine.
Kenzie (Bast):
Ivy, you are, as far as I and Gabriel, and any of our old, old friends are aware, the only one of your kind. And there are people that cannot know that you exist and so the secrecy, what we taught you, we made sure that you didn’t tell anybody, was not because we were scared about what this town could do to you – they are nothing. We could’ve stopped them if we needed to. But there are things more powerful and out of our control, that if they found out that we had –
April:
Ivy supplies the only word she can think of for herself,
April (Ivy):
A monster?
Kenzie (MC):
Gabriel looks like he’s about to cry as soon as that word leaves your mouth and he says,
Kenzie (Gabriel):
No, no. That’s not what we mean.
Kenzie (MC):
And Bast says,
Kenzie (Bast):
Something that they don’t understand. You are not a monster. You are not a danger anymore than any other teenager is a danger to themselves or to their friends. You are not. But we have noticed - and we have tried to help you – have been having problems with control.
April (Ivy):
I’ve been fine. I’ve never needed as much blood as you guys, you know that.
Kenzie (Bast):
Yes, but that doesn’t change how you starve yourself of the thing that you need.
April (Ivy):
What if I –
April:
Ivy realizes that she’s never said this out loud.
April (Ivy):
What if I didn’t need it? Like eventually. What if I could just, you know, as I get older, if I practice and work really hard, maybe I wouldn’t need to be like that.
Kenzie (MC):
Gabriel’s head is hanging and you can see that he’s shaking and he says,
Kenzie (Gabriel):
I don’t have – we don’t have those answers for you because no one like you has ever existed. Again, as far as we know. But what type of life is that, bambolina?
April (Ivy):
Don’t call me that. If its fake, its fake. You don’t need to keep pretending in front of me. And I’m only half you. Only half. I have this whole other half of me that maybe I could choose that instead and I could be not a monster. I could be safe for my friends. I could just grow and get old and be normal and I wouldn’t have to need to hurt people. Don’t you hate that? You can’t exist without hurting people? And you’ve had thousands of years to practice control and you’re still killing people! Kids! You killed a kid!
Kenzie (Bast):
And this brings me back to my point about control. I have for years, had impeccable control. That’s why I don’t feel like I killed him. I understand I did it, but I was not in control because I have been losing myself.
April:
Ivy gets a flash of Adam, the way that he was tonight.
April (Ivy):
Do you know why?
Kenzie (Bast):
Well, I would like to say that it started when Sarah fled, when the barrier began to break. Except that would just be another lie. It got worse when the barrier began to break. But ever since we came here, since we built this place, I have had moments stripped from me that have resulted in lives being stripped from other people. Not a lot. But that doesn’t really matter. It happened.
April (Ivy):
That’s never going to happen with me. It’s not!
April:
She looks between them and the way that they’re looking at her so sad.
Kenzie (Gabriel):
We’re not saying that its going to happen to you. It hasn’t happened to me.
Kenzie (MC):
And you can see that he starts to say the nickname for you and stops himself and then he says,
Kenzie (Gabriel):
That’s not a lie, Ivy. The fact that I still have that accent might have been but the language is my home.
April (Ivy):
Yeah, well I probably outgrew it anyway. So, you killed Ryan. What am I supposed to do with that? He was – I mean we weren’t like close but we – I mean I saw him every day. He’s my classmate. Am I just supposed to walk around knowing that? And its – how do I know its not going to happen again?
Kenzie (Bast):
You don’t ‘cause I don’t. but this is my concern about you is that you never, ever, before high school, before maybe junior high, ever had any misgivings about what you were. And I’ve seen your hunger and I don’t think –
Kenzie (MC):
He looks at Gabriel and Gabriel says,
Kenzie (Gabriel):
We don’t think your going to lose control like him but we do think its affecting you, the wall being down.
April:
Ivy swallows hard and she feels this like hot rush of blood through her body. Her human blood. It feels out of place to have her face blushing so hard and her fangs digging into her tongue. That’s her life. But the growl that comes out of her throat is not human and she says,
April (Ivy):
You have no idea what’s going on with me! And that’s fine. You obviously have your own shit to be dealing with. So let me deal with mine.
Kenzie (Bast)We cant do that, Ivy. You can hate us as much as you want. Neither of us will ever claim that we did everything right or anything right for that matter. But that doesn’t make me or Gabriel care for you any less. And I’m not about to let you do as you wish, if the consequences of that is the people we’ve been trying to hide you from, finding you.
April:
Ivy’s stomach is just this roiling, hot like storm of shame. She hates that she’s yelling at her dads and she knows that they love her. But she can’t stop herself. For a second she wonders if Bast isn’t right. That it is affecting her.
April (Ivy):
You say that you care about me but you’ve been lying to me my entire life. My entire life! And now you’re literally killing my friends. I am safe. I am under control. I know what my limits are. There’s important shit happening and I can’t – can’t be dealing with this too.
Kenzie (Bast):
You have asked us for space with this for a while and we have given it to you with warning and now you’re saying that we don’t know what is going on and never do. So I think that means its about time that we took a more active role.
April (Ivy):
What does that mean? You’re going to ground.
Kenzie (Bast):
I don’t think we could ground you if we tried. I don’t think there’s a lot of things that we could do. I don’t really believe in that anyways. So what that means, even if you don’t believe us because we haven’t given you any reason to, is that we start never telling a lie in this household ever again. It means that whatever it is you think is going on right now, that you’re really worried about to the point where you feel like this doesn’t matter, you tell us so that we can help. Because this does matter. How much worse would it have been if you had been in my place? I have to deal with the fact that I killed a young, innocent kid who had a life ahead of him. I have to look his family in the eyes every day of living in this town, knowing what I did but not being able to tell them what happened to their son. I have to tell lie after lie to the authorities, the FBI that has moved into town to figure out what happened to him. No one finds answers for this. And I have to live with that as I have done it before. And its crushing. I am not unfeeling about it. I have simply lived too many lives to make this thing my end.
April:
Ivy just looks down at her hands.
April (Ivy):
So, no lying?
Kenzie (Bast):
I promise – whether you can take my word for it or not – no lying.
April:
Ivy wants to tell her dads so bad.
April (Ivy):
I’m just – I’m just thinking about Sarah. I just think like that’s the most important thing. We have to find her and get this all under control again.
Kenzie (Gabriel):
If we find her then I think that would make the barrier go back up which may give us more time to figure out –
Kenzie (MC):
He glances at Bast.
Kenzie (Gabriel):
-this problem.
April (Ivy):
Who are you so afraid of finding me? I mean we have so many friends. All my aunts and uncles and cousins, they all know, don’t they?
Kenzie (Gabriel):
They do but this is so hard to explain because you weren’t there at the beginning and its’ so outdated to the concept of our times now. But, there were so few of us vampires at the start, that we banded together. We all became friends. And then it started growing and there were rules and laws and if you broke the law, there wasn’t really a chance for – you didn’t get second chances. And as we spread, smaller groups started popping up and becoming their own. At the time they were called families, right?
Kenzie (MC):
And he kinda looks at Bast and Bast says,
Kenzie (Bast):
We thought of ourselves as families to begin but his has long ago changed and its probably impossible now but at that time, every vampire who existed, if you made another one, if you found another one, the rules were that they joined a coterie. And these coteries were run by – if you can believe it – vampires older than me. Vampires who are still older than me and there’s something that comes with age in this form, power that can be wielded that we stand no chance against. And it had always been thought dangerous for a child to be turned. There was a time, a dark time, in which one of us lost their way and rampaged through London, turning children elft and right. Young enough that they had no idea what was happening to them. Young enough that there was no way to control their hunger. They killed their own families without knowing what they were doing. And he was eventually stopped. And all of those children as well. And it was made law for us that offspring were not allowed. And so, when you were being born and we took the drastic measures needed, it was a moments decision, and we had no idea what to expect from you. But you started growing and you were different than any of that because you weren’t fully vampiric. But that doesn’t change that we still felt the need to keep you a secret because we don’t think they’d let you be.
April:
Ivy sits very still.
April (Ivy):
I understand now. But eventually we can just tell them I’m a vampire, right? Like this isn’t going to be my whole life.
Kenzie (Gabriel):
I don’t know. You have just said that you may not want to live like this and while I don’t think that that’s actually going to be able to be a possibility for you, I don’t know if it would be smart to ever let them know. But that doesn’t mean you can’t live your life, it just means that you probably would need to live it amongst humans rather than vampires, which you do today
already mostly. Or we could –Kenzie (MC):
And Bast says,
Kenzie (Bast):
I don’t think I’m willing to take that chance and announcing you and it turning not in our favor.
April (Ivy):
So you don’t think I can live my life as either.
Kenzie (Gabriel):
We broke ties – well not fully of course – but we haven’t spoken with our coterie in hundreds of years. Our friends that you know, Eleanor – especially Eleanor – hates the idea of coteries. They’re old and past the point of needing to be disbanded but they are run by some people you can’t really say that to or who would listen to you without beheading you. So, its not that you can’t live amongst – you live amongst both right now, Ivy. You live with us and you live with the people that we have over and you live with the humans in Wildmoore. I don’t have a clear answer for you.
April:
Ivy wants to just fight for the sake of fighting. But something about hearing your parents say that they don’t have answers for you is – the anger kinda drains out of her.
April (Ivy):
That’s – yeah, okay? So can I go to be now or…?
Kenzie (Gabriel):
If you don’t have any more questions, yes.
April (Ivy):
Okay.
April:
And then she just kinda walks out. She heads into her bedroom and without turning the light on just glances out her window.
Kenzie (MC):
You see a figure leaned up against the shed in the backyard. The figure’s in the dark but you can kinda tell by the shadow that their arms are crossed and by the tilt of their head they seem to be looking up into your window.
April:
Ivy gives a tiny wave and then closes her curtain, throws herself on her bed, and tries to cry but nothing comes out.
Brennan Hershock:
:I don’t think Ivy that Ivy would initiate this. I think Sawyer would just try to fucking do it as quickly as he could after the Caleb conversation. Probably text in like the middle of the night after that creek experience. Yeah, I just think the stress would be eating him alive. The first time I text her is like ten pm on that Monday. I’m in my room, I’m probably under probably two sets of covers because I’m so cold from the stress and anxiety. I’m sweating though. My hands are clammy. I’ll type, thumbs shaking, the dreaded, “Can we talk?” Probably sixty seconds go by before you get,
Brennan (Sawyer Hook):Like tonight.
April:
Ivy is listening to music in her room. She gets the notification for Sawyer’s text. Reads it. Doesn’t say anything.
Brennan:
Do you have your reads on?
April:
Yeah.
Brennan:
Sawyer is going to throw off the covers and walk over to his axolotl tank and bend down and get eye to eye with the axolotl.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Well, I guess I gotta do it.
Brennan:
And he will put on some sneakers, head down to the garage, very sneakily. I’m assuming that the parents are asleep by ten. There’s no way that parents are up past eight, eight thirty. And I will get on my bike and start riding to Ivy’s house. And I’ll put my phone on silent on the way. Ivy is like looking at the texts from Sawyer and she thinks about texting him, shuts her phone off, opens it back up, and then just ignores it. And she turns on her little like aroma therapy thing with the sleepy time mix of like lavender and rose and she flops on the bed and she just goes,
April (Ivy):
Everything is okay. It’s not. It’s not. But just try to calm the fuck down. Please Ivy, just calm the fuck down.
Brennan:
You definitely get a text.
April:
Still like starfished on the bed, she just like grabs her phone, holds it in front of her face.
Brennan:
I probably put my bike near the gate and then walked up more just kinda made a circle around the house towards the back outside her window so when she opened it, she’d be able to see me. And I’m just on my phone.
Brennan (Sawyer):
I don’t want to like throw a stone at your window because everyone in your entire house will hear it but I’m outside.
Kenzie (MC):
There’s a shadow that kinda overcomes you.
Brennan:
I’ll slowly look up.
Kenzie (Kai):
Hey Sawyer.
Kenzie (MC):
And it is the visage of Kai.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Hi, uh…
Brennan:
And Sawyer will look just like in every direction.
Brennan (Sawyer):
You are here.
Kenzie (Kai):
Yeah. You’re here.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Yeah, its more weird that you’re here. Why are you here?
Kenzie (Kai):
I was told to be here and Ivy knows I’m here.
Brennan (Sawyer):
That’s just making it weird. This is compound weird now.
Kenzie (Kai):
I told her from the beginning that this was a really weird situation so yeah I’m understanding of the weird.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Okay, well I’m here on a mission.
Kenzie (Kai):
Yeah, it looks like it. To do what exactly?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Just have a little talk. Little talky talk. Little one on one. (clears throat) Just me and Ivy. Two people. Just us.
Kenzie (MC):
She kinda peers over the top of your phone that has faded to dark and like turned off at this point, so she can’t see anything.
Kenzie (Kai):
She text you back? She wanna talk to you?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Yeah, we’re best friends.
Kenzie (Kai):
Okay.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Are you gonna like beat me up? What is happening?
Kenzie (Kai):
Why would I beat you up?
Brennan (Sawyer):
I don’t know – I don’t know but I –
Kenzie (Kai):
I met you like three nights ago.
Brennan (Sawyer):
I don’t know but this is like, man, this is a big wrench in the plan now.
Kenzie (Kai):
Me being here?
Brennan (Sawyer):
I guess. I just – I have this script that I’m kinda losing now. I had a script in my head.
Kenzie (Kai):
Oh, alright well uh, one second.
Kenzie (MC):
Ivy you hear a stone hit your window
Brennan (Sawyer):
No!
April:
Ivy had read the text from Sawyer and was just freaking out, trying to get dressed. When she hears the rock his her window she flies across the room and throws the window up. She says,
April (Ivy):
Sawyer, you said you weren’t going to throw a rock.
Brennan:
Sawyer’s got his hands out,
Brennan (Sawyer):
It wasn’t me! It was Kai.
Kenzie (Kai):
Yeah sorry it was me. He’s just getting really, pretty fucking annoying.
April (Ivy):
Yeah, he does that.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Wha - !?
April (Ivy):
How long have you been here?
Kenzie (Kai):
Me?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Me? Her.
April (Ivy):
Yeah.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Not me?
Kenzie (Kai):
Me.
Brennan (Sawyer):
You.
Kenzie (Kai):
Like an hour.
April (Ivy):
Right… Sawyer why are you here?
Brennan:
And I’ll look at Kai (laughs).
Kenzie (Kai):
You guys can chat. I’ll go back I was just really fucking annoyed at hearing you blabbering on so…
Brennan (Sawyer):
You came up to me!
Kenzie (Kai):
Have fun, friends!
Kenzie (MC):
And she just like peace signs out and walks back to where Ivy, you have seen her before, like by the shed in the back yard.
Brennan (Sawyer):
She just stays in the shed?
April (Ivy):
Honestly, I don’t really know.
April:
Ivy like pops out the window screen, climbs onto the roof. Walks around with just the utmost confidence, like she’s just walking on the street.
April (Ivy):
Hey so, you wanna come up here?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Uh, yup, should I take the stairs inside?
April (Ivy):
No. I don’t – I don’t think so.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Alright well, let’s find a way up this.
April (Ivy):
I think you can use that tree over there.
Brennan:
Sawyer’s like hugging onto one of the columns like trying to like shimmy up, shimmy down, walk over.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Right, yeah, I climb trees all the time.
Brennan:
Cracks his knuckles.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Just a running start.
Brennan:
And I will run at the tree and attempt to climb this tree. I will jump at the tree and have one foot land on it and thinking its going to accelerate me and push me up, it’ll just scrap the bark and I’ll fall forward on the side of the tree without hitting my head or anything.
Brennan (Sawyer):
(groans) Do you think it’d be easier if you just came down here?
April:
Ivy just raises one eyebrow.
April (Ivy):
Yeah, okay.
Brennan (Sawyer):
No, no, no, nope. I can – I’m gonna climb the tree.
April (Ivy):
Yeah?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Uh-huh.
Brennan:
And Sawyer’s going to, this time, he’s going to attempt to just go small branch by small branch and slowly, probably it takes five or six minutes to get up this tree and caterpillars his way across this thick long branch until he can hop over past the gutter and onto the roof top. When he lands, profusely sweating.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Okay, yeah, can we sit down?
April (Ivy):
Uh, sure, yeah.
April:
Ivy sit like right on the edge of the roof with like her legs dangling.
Brennan:
Sawyer will sit on the roof but with his knees up towards his chest and a little bit behind you.
Brennan (Sawyer):
So, you saw my texts?
April (Ivy):
Uh, yes I did.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Am I – do you not want me here?
April:
Ivy kinda looks up at the sky.
April (Ivy):
It’s not about that – it’s not – it’s not about whether I want you here or not. Its about what’s best for you, you know?
Brennan (Sawyer):
I love you, buddy, pal. Nope, hold one. I love you – I love you pal, bud. (sighs) Hold on.
April (Ivy):
Mm-hmm?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Ivy, dude, I fucking love you dude. Okay? And I was recently told the way that I thought about everything was kinda wrong. I just thought that was a given, you know? And I didn’t know that that was something I should be saying because I was like, you know, of course, right? But I do love you.
April:
When Sawyer had his first outburst, Ivy turned to look at him and just watched this whole thing happen with a very still expression. But all at once, you just see her start to cry.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Uh, I’m sorry?
April (Ivy):
No, no, don’t – you don’t have to say sorry. Really?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Yeah, you’re like my best friend in the whole world and I just kinda thought that was how we did things. Like, you know, we’re kinda assholes to each other and I don’t know like, we’re mean to each other but in like a way that is good. That like matters. On my end I didn’t think any of that was real, I didn’t… sometimes I’m really mad at you.
April (Ivy):
I deserve that. I’ve been not my best recently.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Its more – I get mad, Ivy, ‘cause you’re like, you’re like so much of everything that I want to be. And its like, I don’t want to be mad at that ‘cause you’re just you and – but doesn’t mean, I don’t like – I – I sometimes get confused about that (groans).
April (Ivy):
Why would you want to be anything like me? I’m dangerous. I’m dramatic. I’m out of control all the time. And I can’t – I hurt everyone around me. My parents and you. And Caleb. And Adam. And Natalie. Every person –
Brennan (Sawyer):
Me? When have you hurt me?
April (Ivy):
I saw the way you looked at me after… with Caleb…
Brennan (Sawyer):
Ivy, yeah, I mean, I was pretty fucking terrified. Like we’re in a fucking cave, a magic cave, what the fuck! With like crazy, sludge demon magic and shit. But the worst like part of that whole thing is I’m fucking scared because the two people – the two people that I give a fuck about most are going to fucking kill each other. And I’m going to lose both of them? And then I’m going to fucking alone and have nothing. So it’s like, what else do I do besides stand in the way of a fucking claw or throw a rock at your head because you guys both promised you wouldn’t kill or hurt me and I believe you. But I don’t know what – I don’t understand you guys and I won’t and that’s fine but I don’t know what would happen if I don’t – if I’m not doing my job.
April (Ivy):
I don’t think I would ever hurt you but I didn’t think I would ever hurt Caleb either and I’m not safe for you. Its not safe for you to be around me anymore. We’re not- we’re not kids. We have to think about this in the span of our whole lives. Like I am this monster. And you’re just – you’re a human. You have so much life. I have to always hide who I am and stay away from the people I love because if I get too close to them then I’ll ruin it. I always ruin it.
Brennan:
Sawyer sits there for a second.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Well, then why am I here? You didn’t ruin anything with me. And I trust you. What could you do to me? I’m not thinking about this like a kid. And this is – see it makes me mad sometimes. Like when you say thinks like you can never be yourself. Dude, like you like live so much more than me. I don’t know if you know that. I don’t fucking do anything. And that’s why its like the best to be around you. ‘cause like I’m actually – I’m not just this human, normal, whatever. And its not ‘cause your - or Caleb - are fucking monsters? Its ‘cause you’re fucking awesome. And you’re like super spontaneous and you al - but at the same time you always look out for your friends. And even if – I don’t know – like I said, you’re like what I want to be.
April (Ivy):
You’re what I want to be. You’re so loyal. I push everyone away all the time. You’r so steady and funny and everyone that’s around you I always so happy to be around you. You make them feel comfortable. I get to be myself when I’m around you like for real Ivy. Not like Ivy the vampire or Ivy the cheerleader or – just Ivy.
Brennan (Sawyer):
See, even this right here? You’re showing like – I can’t even – I couldn’t – I can’t even articulate like that. I don’t know even how to do that. And its like that’s one of the bajillion reason why I love you, bud.
Brennan:
And Sawyer’s smiling.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Idiot.
April (Ivy):
Dumbass. I love you too. I really do. And I’m sorry that I’ve been ignoring you. I just really thought you were better off without me. Kinda think everyone’s better off without me so.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Well… hey, can I sleep over tonight maybe? We could do – we could like, I don’t know, just hang out.
April (Ivy):
Yeah, totally.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Um, is Kai just gonna be watching.
April (Ivy):
Um, you know, I haven’t really figured that out yet.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Yeah like what the fuck is up with all that?
April (Ivy):
Yeah she’s kinda – she’s like watching over me in like a protective way.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Um, that’s my – I’m doing that too!
April (Ivy):
Shut up.
Kenzie (MC):
Kai peeks around the side of the shed as you yell that into the yard and says,
Kenzie (Kai):
Oh, that’s really interesting that you’re doing that too.
Brennan (Sawyer):
You’re just standing behind a shed, listening – god, this is so weird. Not that – by the way, not that you need the protection or anything but like, you know.
April (Ivy):
Yeah I. mean I could like throw you off this roof and kill you in like one second if I wanted to .
Kenzie (Kai):
I would love that not to happen! Just gonna throw that out there.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Me too. Me too.
Kenzie (Kai):
Cool.
April (Ivy):
Hey, Kai, um, are you gonna be here tomorrow or…?
Kenzie (Kai):
We’ll see.
April (Ivy):
Okay, let me know.
Kenzie (Kai):
This night turned out not the way I expected it to.
April (Ivy):
How did you expect it to?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Yeah, what – yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, ask that.
Kenzie (Kai):
I’ll see ya later.
Kenzie (MC):
And she kind a like disappears behind the shed.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Wait, wait, wait, get her back. Get her back! Ask her again!
April (Ivy):
Sawyer, I don’t think you want to know the answer to that.
Brennan (Sawyer):
No, I do. I absolutely fucking love the tea.
April (Ivy):
Okay, well, I have a lot to tell you.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Well let’s go inside because I’m fucking cold.
Kenzie (MC):
About a week after, a week and a half after all the drama with your families went down. School day. And you are being shaken awake in your bed and you hear.
Kenzie (Daniel Moore):
Alright, up and at ‘em, Caleb. Let’s go.
Mads McDonough (Caleb Moore):
(sniffles) What time – what time is it? What?
Mads
I like try and bat the hand away from me.
Kenzie (MC):
You can see just the dark outline in the room in which he is not found it necessary to turn on any lights.
Mads (Caleb):
What are you doing? What time is it?
Kenzie (Daniel):
It’s early. Come on. We’re going.
Mads (Caleb):
Where are we going?
Kenzie (Daniel):
I gotta show you some stuff.
Mads (Caleb):
Why are you – what?
Kenzie (Daniel):
Get dressed. Let’s go.
Mads (Caleb):
(groans)
Mads
I get up.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Okay, get dressed. I’ll meet you downstairs.
Mads
Just half a sleep, like nod, like sitting upright in my bed but my eyes are like crunched shut.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Five minutes.
Mads (Caleb):
Okay.
Mads
Whenever he leaves the room I like take a really deep breath and hold my hands over my face and scrub them a couple of times up and down my cheeks. Get up out of bed, find some pants, put on a T-shirt, grab my hoodie, put socks on. Wrong pair of sock. Put a different pair of socks on. Feel around for my phone, grab my phone. Feel around for my wallet, maybe, I don’t know. I can’t remember where I put it last night, I just have my phone and I go downstairs.
Kenzie (MC):
As you’re going down the stairs you see that the light from the kitchen is on and so it lights up the stairwell as you go down but it seems to be the only light in the house that is one currently. And your father is standing in the kitchen, waiting for you and as you come down the stairs and he looks at your feet and he’s like,
Kenzie (Daniel):
I got different shoes for you in the garage. Come on.
Mads (Caleb):
Why do I need different shoes?
Kenzie (Daniel):
‘Cause we’re going out, okay?
Mads (Caleb):
Can I have breakfast?
Kenzie (Daniel):
No, get it when we come back.
Mads
I grab a piece of bread, not even a piece of toast. Just straight up a piece of bread out of the bag that’s on the counter. I just shove it my mouth have asleep and like,
Mads (Caleb):
(groans)
Mads
Follow him out. Not a morning person.
Kenzie (MC):
You follow him outside the back door and over to the unattached garage. He slides the door up and pulls the chain light and the dim yellow glow isn’t really strong enough to shed light into all the dark corners. But he goes to a shelf and grabs a pair of rubber boots and throws them at you. And you can see that he’s also wearing rubber boots and he hops onto the golf cart that’s in the garage and pats the seat next to him. He looks at you and he says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
Come on. I heard what you said, you’re right. We didn’t prepare you like we should have, and I can’t fix that but I can at least make sure you’re kept in the loop from now on.
Mads
I almost say out loud, “And now is when you want to do it?” but my brain to mouth filter hasn’t turned on enough. There’s also a piece of bread there and if I open my mouth the breads going to fall on the ground and I want the bread more and I just go,
Mads (Caleb):
(groans)
Mads
Pull the shoes on, get on the golf cart.
Kenzie (MC):
You often woke up, even when you were quite young, to your dad and Adam from some early morning excursion that they never asked you to go with them on. This kidna feels like maybe it’s the first time. But, your dad drives you through the property, passing the house that your Aunt Sarah once lived in. driving out and out, riding alongside the woods toward the marshes. And before you get there, a fetid stench hits your noise. Your dad pulls the cart to a halt and hands you a flashlight. The sky is just beginning to lighten but it’s still not bright enough to see clearly. And he flicks on the flashlight. You can kinda hear his boots squishing into the less than hard earth. The grass right here is tall but you’re just at the edge of the marshes so it’s not as tall as it climbs in other places. And your dad walks a few paces away and squats down, flashlight aimed at the ground and at first you think you’re just seeing mud but then, no, it’s the same black sludge that was corrupting the heart. And the same sludge that Adam had mentioned seeing out here before.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Yeah, uh, this is the problem.
Kenzie (MC):
And as your dad lifts the flashlight up and across the high grass and plants, you see that there’s a state of unnatural decay about the land.
Kenzie (Daniel):
And not even I can fix this, ‘cause I’ve tried.
Mads (Caleb):
What did you try doing?
Kenzie (MC):
He puts his hand out and it hovers over the ground, and he closes his eyes and he takes a deep breath. And you haven’t seen your dad do this a lot, but you’ve seen it every now and again. And you see a shimmering of gold and green as your dad’s green thumb comes to life in front of your eyes. But it’s almost suffocated out like snuffing out a candle when it nears part of this black substance. And he opens his yes again and he says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
I can’t even touch it.
Mads (Caleb):
How long has it been here?
Kenzie (MC):
He presses his hands into his thighs as he stands up and he says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
Well I don’t know how long it’s been here exactly but I found it here, uh, almost like when you started going back to school.
Mads (Caleb):
Has it gotten worse?
Kenzie (Daniel):
It’s gotten worse and I think its spreading. But it is only spreading, at least, as far as I’ve figured out, its spreading quicker through water. And hasn’t yet found a way to found a way to spread onto the dry land yet. But unfortunately, I also found it in the lake and, uh, so far I’ve told the police that I don’t know what it is but that for right now, no one should be allowed to swim there. So they have it barricaded off somehow.
Mads (Caleb):
Dad, how long have you known that Aunt Sarah’s been missing?
Kenzie (Daniel):
Well, she left Wildmoore a little over two years ago. Um missing though? A year. I knew she left when she left, I just thought she’d be coming back because we’re Moores. This is where we’ve always been.
Mads (Caleb):
I thought it was weird when I didn’t get a birthday card from her this year but there’s kind a lot going on, I wasn’t thinking about it as much I guess.
Mads
I cross my arms over my chest, kinda tuck my head down a little bit. And I’m halfway staring at this muck and also just kinda letting my eyes unfocus and drift for a minute.
Mads (Caleb):
Are you aware of what’s been going on with Adam? Like he’s been different since –
Mads
And I almost try to make a gesture still with my arms crossed to myself, using my chin.
Mads (Caleb):
The other night though, when we went to see what was going on, this stuff? It’s in him.
Kenzie (Daniel):
What do you mean its in him?
Mads
Caleb kind alike squeezes his eyes shut and runs a hand up through his hair.
Mads (Caleb):
I don’t know. He got really weird. He started talking about stuff. And he’s just been weird but its starting to get creepy. And I looked at him and there was like another voice that was with him and then he had like this stuff, it was like all over him. And then it wasn’t but it was. I don’t know. It’s like he’s infected with it or something. And he said he’s been using other means to try and not let it take over.
Kenzie (Daniel):
When you asked the question I had thought maybe you had meant, did we know he had started using drugs? And that became clear a couple week ago. The rest of it though, uh, did not know. And I don’t –
Kenzie (MC):
He takes a few steps away from the marshland and says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
I don’t – the sludge is in him?
Mads (Caleb):
I – I don’t know. I don’t know. I just – okay, just don’t look at me like I’m crazy. I know this sounds crazy.
Kenzie (Daniel):
No, I’m not looking at you like you’re crazy. I’m looking at this entire situation like its crazy because that’s all I’ve felt like for the past couple months. We’re all kinda on edge.
Mads (Caleb):
When Sarah was younger and she was just getting this –
Mads
This time now I uncross my arms and gesture frantically to myself.
Mads (Caleb):
-this stuff. When she was still getting used to it and trying to figure it out, did she ever talk about like – I just feel things. And I smell things and di see things and I can hear things and it makes me feel like I’m crazy. It makes me feel like I’m losing my mind. I know that you guys have told me my whole life that this is like some special gift, but it wasn’t supposed to be mine so I’m not really –
Kenzie (Daniel):
Okay, uh, Caleb. It is supposed to be yours. That’s why you have it.
Mads (Caleb):
(scoffs) No, it’s not.
Kenzie (Daniel):
We misguidedly thought it would be Adam ‘cause he was the firstborn and that’s just how its mostly been. So it was a bit of a surprise that it was you. But it was never supposed to be somebody else. If it was supposed to be for Adam, he would’ve been born with it.
Mads
He just opens and closes his mouth a couple times like he’s about to reply but each time he closes his mouth again, he kinda just grits his teeth a little bit until finally he sucks in his bottom lips and then just like stares down at the ground.
Mads (Caleb):
Did she say anything about that stuff though? Did she say that? I can’t exactly ask her myself.
Kenzie (Daniel):
It would be great if she was here. She talked about having heightened senses, being able to hear stuff far away, being able to pick out specific sounds in a loud room. Being able to smell things more clearly or more strongly maybe is the word. I don’t think she ever talked about seeing things though. Are you seeing things?
Mads (Caleb):
Not like that. Not like seeing – actually maybe a little like that – it’s not, it’s not – like I’m sane and stuff. I don’t… when I saw whatever it was with Adam, I closed my eyes and I tried to smell and hear and do all those other things that I’ve been doing lately that I get extra from, more from, I don’t know. But that time whenever I did it, in that room with Adam, when he was starting to like get really weird and he didn’t want to leave and he just wanted to touch the goo, it was like I saw him standing there and it was like there was something else that was there too. And it was –
Mads
And he gestures down to the ground.
Mads (Caleb):
-this stuff except it was like it was a thing. It wasn’t just like goo. It wasn’t just this – don’t look at me like that – it said something to me. It said it was excited to meet me and that’s when I kinda, um, when I sorta, um –
Mads
He tries to gesture his hand up and down to himself and then shakes his head and crosses his arms over his chest again.
Mads (Caleb):
It’s when I changed for the first time. It just kinda overwhelmed me. I don’t remember much.
Kenzie (Daniel):
I’m sorry that the first time you became the wolf it wasn’t in a good place. Would’ve been nice to have kinda celebrated it. That’s what we did with Sarah. Its kinda like a second birthday almost. I guess we could still like do that.
Mads (Caleb):
We don’t have to. It’s not – Adam would make a thing about it.
Kenzie (Daniel):
It would just be a family thing. It would just be us. Friends if you wanted. Well, Ivy and Sawyer if you wanted.
Mads (Caleb):
I don’t know its kinda embarrassing – I mean they saw me for the first time like that too. And I don’t think it was good. I don’t think they should see that again.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Okay.
Mads (Caleb):
But maybe if it was just you and mom. We could go like those little pastry tarts from Ramoni’s, maybe. We could like kinda
Kenzie (Daniel):
Yeah, kiddo.
Kenzie (MC):
And he kinda like puts his arm over your shoulders and his hand up at the top of your and ruffles your hair. Which is a little bit weird because you are kinda taller than him. You definitely got your height from you mom. And its also a little bit weird because your dad isn’t the most showing of affection man you’ve ever met. But he does that and he ruffles your hair and he says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
Yeah, kiddo, I think we can do that.
Mads
I pretend like I hate it.
Kenzie (Daniel):
The stuff about your brother though…
Kenzie (MC):
He looks at his watch on his wrist.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Ahhhh, yeah, alright. Um, let’s head back to the house. Maybe wake him up and talk this out more ‘cause you shouldn’t be the one dealing with this, at least alone.
Mads (Caleb):
Wait when –
Mads
I’m going to take a step forward and look down at the ground again.
Mads (Caleb):
The stuff that you do, Adam can do it too, right? Maybe he just –
Mads
I’m going to kneel down a little bit.
Mads (Caleb):
-did it too much? And that’s how it got him.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Would prefer if you step back a little bit because if touching it is what allowed it to get into him, I don’t want the same thing to happen to you.
Mads (Caleb):
Maybe it would be different because of the –
Kenzie (Daniel):
Caleb, don’t touch it.
Mads (Caleb):
Okay.
Mads
Stand back upright.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Let’s go back to the house. See if your moms up already. See if we can get to the bottom of this.
Mads (Caleb):
Does he have to know that I told you? Can you say you saw something instead? He’s like super on drugs. He could get sloppy. Just say that you saw something.
Kenzie (Daniel):
We have been working on some sort of – intervention I don’t think work – but some sort of thing like that to curb whatever this is, ‘cause we did know about the d rug thing. But if that problem is stemming from something greater than himself, I think that we should just all try to help him, yeah?
Mads (Caleb):
Doesn’t want my help…
Kenzie (Daniel):
Caleb.
Mads
I look at him.
Kenzie (Daniel):
I know you two haven’t been getting along and I’m not going to make you get along with him. You’re very different people but you used to have something that brought you together. And I’m hard pressed to believe that that’s completely lost. So maybe just showing a little bit of compassion, someday, maybe he’ll show it in return.
Mads (Caleb):
Someday.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Do you want to drive the golf cart back?
Mads (Caleb):
Yeah.
Kenzie (MC):
And he climbs in the passenger seat.
Mads
I try not to look too excited jumping into the driving seat.
Kenzie (MC):
You drive back to the house I think with minimal problems. There’s a moment where you’re dad’s like,
Kenzie (Daniel):
Okay, maybe not this fast over a hill, okay?
Kenzie (MC):
And you make it back to the garage, park, go inside. Your mom is up in the kitchen and you dad walks in and stops you from walking in behind him and points to the side to make you take off your boots. And then he goes in and he says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
Sharon, do you have a minute before you leave for work? I think we gotta talk to the boys.
Kenzie (MC):
And she looks up from where she’s packing her purse, looks at the clock on the stove and can read from whatever look is on your dad’s face that this is a little bit important, and so, you all, as this trio, climb up the stairs, go into Adam’s room. He is conked out on the bed, drool – completely like mouth open drooling. But there’s also like sweat on his sheets around him and his skin is shiny with it.
Your parents wake up Adam and he like gasps, sits up with a start, panting, eyes wild and he’s like,
Kenzie (Adam Moore):
What!? What’s hap – what’s going on!?
Kenzie (MC):
And your mom’s like,
Kenzie (Sharon Moore):
Calm down, sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you awake. We just want to talk.
Kenzie (MC):
And she reaches over and she flips on his bedside lamp and says,
Kenzie (Sharon):
Your dad said there’s something important we need to talk about and I wanted to be here before I left for work.
Kenzie (MC):
And he looks up at your dad, looks kinda around your dad where you’re standing and says,
Kenzie (Adam):
Caleb, I swear to fucking god that you didn’t say anything.
Mads
I am stepping behind my father and squatting down a little bit.
Kenzie (Adam):
Caleb, are you fucking serious!? Are you kidding me?
Mads
I am looking at a poster on the wall in his room and then to another one and then to a third and then down at the floor where I see a weird looking crumpled sock. I make a really funny looking face and I got back to the poster on the wall.
Kenzie (MC):
Your dad says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
Hey! Hey, Adam, settle down, okay? We were going to have a talk sooner than later anyway about another issue.
Kenzie (MC):
And he opens the drawer of Adam’s desk and there’s a bag with purple skull pills. And Adam’s face changes so swiftly from anger to desperation and he’s like,
Kenzie (Adam):
No, no, please no. You can’t take those. You can’t take those.
Kenzie (MC):
And your mom says,
Kenzie (Sharon):
Adam, what is going on with you.
Kenzie (MC):
And your dad says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
Caleb said that you touched whatever that black sludge is that we found in the marshes. That it’s inside of you. I don’t really understand how that is possible.
Kenzie (MC):
And Adam says,
Kenzie (Adam):
Uh, I don’t – I don’t know how it happened. We were just out there one day and we were looking at the stuff and I touched it and I thought like I just like fainted or something. It just felt like I blacked out for a minute and then I was awake again and I didn’t know anything was wrong until later. And you can’t take those things though because those are the only things that make it stop. The only thing that makes it go away. You can’t take ‘em.
Kenzie (MC):
And your mom says,
Kenzie (Sharon):
Adam, makes what go away? What are you talking about?
Kenzie (MC):
And Adam goes, like hands up by his head, just pointing at his skull.
Kenzie (Adam):
The fucking thing in there that talks to me all the time, okay? It just doesn’t fucking go away. And its there all the time and its just saying shit and I can’t get it out of my fucking head. I can’t fucking believe that you told them, Caleb, come on!
Mads
I’m doing anything to not look at him.
Kenzie (MC):
Your dad says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
What? What is this – what is this thing that you’re talking about?
Kenzie (Adam):
I don’t know, okay? I don’t know what the thing is. I just know that I was like really fucked up about the whole not being the wolf thing and I didn’t know what to fucking do with myself because you guys had taught me my whole fucking life that that’s what I was meant to do and meant to be. And then I’m not it. And then like – what do I fucking have left now? When this thing – I didn’t even look for this thing, I just fucking happened.
Kenzie (MC):
He stops and he thinks and he goes,
Kenzie (Adam):
Wait a second though that doesn’t make any fucking sense.
Kenzie (MC):
Pulls open the drawer in the bedside table and Caleb, you watch as he pulls out this palm sized coin that you’ve seen once before.
Kenzie (Adam):
‘Cause the sludge… but I did the –
Kenzie (MC):
And your dad goes,
Kenzie (Daniel):
Adam what the hell is that?
Kenzie (Adam):
I just found it in the woods and I thought it was weird. And then – its got like this weird symbol on it that’s like on that – on the Devil Shrine. So I thought that was weird. But I didn’t really know what it was.
Mads (Caleb):
It came from the creek.
Kenzie (Adam):
Yeah that’s where I found it in the woods.
Mads (Caleb):
It was – you never saw it – you never –
Kenzie (Adam):
I’m seeing it right now, Caleb.
Mads (Caleb):
Adam, do you remember when - we were really, really little – do you remember when Ivy attacked you? Do you remember that?
Kenzie (Adam):
Yeah, kinda an emblazoned memory in my brain, you know.
Mads (Caleb):
It was over that. That’s what I found.
Kenzie (Adam):
I didn’t have this then. I didn’t take it that day.
Mads (Caleb):
When did you find it?
Kenzie (Adam):
I don’t know, like right at the start of summer.
Mads (Caleb):
It had the same voice back then too I just – I didn’t remember it. I didn’t –
Kenzie (Adam):
Wait, you’ve heard the thing.
Mads
I look up to him now. This whole time, the only thing that made me look in his direction was staring at the coin but now I’m looking at my brother. I take a minute. I swallow.
Mads (Caleb):
Yeah.
Kenzie (Adam):
Okay, well, if you’ve heard the thing too – what I just confused about though was the fact that – this is – I think I might’ve – I didn’t mean to. I didn’t know what I was doing. But I brought something here. I allowed it in. but that’s not necessarily related to the sludge because that happened afterwards. But that fucked me up even more.
Mads (Caleb):
The coin’s been here though. And it sounded the same back then too, I just didn’t – I thought I kinda made it up. I thought I made a lot thing up when we were younger.
Kenzie (Adam):
Wait a second. Did I not do this then? Did this happen that day, at the creek?
Mads
I shake my head.
Mads (Caleb):
Whenever I found it, it talked. But then everything else happened and Ivy and I dropped it and –
Kenzie (Adam):
(laughing) So I didn’t like massively fuck up.
Mads
I’m about to like shake my head no to try and reassure him and then I kind like stop myself, roll my eyes a little bit.
Mads (Caleb):
Not this time.
Kenzie (Adam):
I guess it was a pretty big fuck up to make a deal with some, weird entity that shouldn’t be able to exist so that’s a pretty big fuck up. But I didn’t do it. I didn’t bring it here.
Mads (Caleb):
You made a deal with it? Adam!
Kenzie (Adam):
Was that like not clear?
Kenzie (MC):
And your mother’s like,
Kenzie (Sharon):
You made a deal with some thing that you – Adam what the hell have – where does your brain go? What is this thing? What deal did you make?
Kenzie (Adam):
Well, I like didn’t know what I was supposed to do after the whole wolf thing happened and so I was just kinda lost and I don’t know, it didn’t really ask for anything… okay that’s not true. I don’t know, it didn’t really seem like I was making a deal. It was just like this thing had a way to like make me feel like I had a sense of purpose again and then it was less of like a… I don’t know. I don’t know how it works. Just whispers shit in my head all day long and I can’t get away from it. And it kinda makes me do shit that I know that I don’t really want to do. I guess… I don’t know…
Kenzie (MC):
His shoulders kinda droop in his bed and he looks at you and he looks at your parents and he goes,
Kenzie (Adam):
I guess I’m just like pretty fucked up. And I don’t really have a lot of energy to deal with it anymore so, have at it guys! ‘Cause, uh, doesn’t seem like anybody’s throwing out answers right now. So, should I get ready for school or does this kinda get me out of a day? Are we feeling, ya know, a kid possessed by some kind of demonic evil doesn’t have to go to high school, right?
Mads (Caleb):
Get over yourself!
Kenzie (Adam):
What the hell?
Mads (Caleb):
What that’s it? You get knocked down once and you give up?
Kenzie (Adam):
I get knocked down once?
Mads
I’m going to step into the room like fully now and start to get closer to him. My fists are balled at my side and there’s like this energy that is suddenly over taking me that I definitely didn’t have coming into this situation. But there is still something very, very, very deep in my body that thinks that my brother is all that he acts himself up to be. That he is this unstoppable force. And it pisses me off when this version of Adam is putting himself down in a way that I just can’t explain it. I hold up one of my hands to him, point my finger out and start jabbing it in the air.
Mads (Caleb):
You’re Adam Moore. You’re the golden boy of this family. Everything has always been set out for you. But you didn’t take it. It wasn’t enough for you. You always wanted more than that. Where did he go, Adam? Look, I get that this –
Mads
And I gesture to myself frantically. I look at my parents.
Mads (Caleb):
-that it was supposed to be –
Mads
I look at my dad.
Mads (Caleb):
-that we thought it was yours. I’m just kinda making this up as I go because I thought it was yours too. But if you give up now before I have a chance to figure out what the hell is going on? No. No, that is not going to happen. We don’t know what’s happening. We don’t know what’s going on. No one knows what’s going on. No one knows where Sarah is or where the sludge came from or what’s wrong with that coin thing and why it talks. But if we give up now, what’s the point? What’s all this anything that we’ve been working toward? I know you don’t care about this. You can’t find the energy to care about this. Can you fake it for a little bit?
Kenzie (Adam):
I can’t find the energy to care about this, Caleb, because I’ve been fighting it nonstop for like three months.
Mads (Caleb):
Three months? (laughs) Three months of fighting it? Of fighting this goo, is that it? Or just fighting how depressed you’ve been? ‘Cause I’ve been fighting a creature inside me and it sucks. Okay, it sucks, dude. This is awful. I feel like its tearing my insides out every day. I feel like I’m going to lose my mind or at least get a migraine from how much everything is. The smells, the sounds, the all of it. I know it’s a gift and I know that you wanted it really bad. But its not exactly rainbows and puppies and kittens over here.
Kenzie (MC):
Adam climbs out of his bed and he’s standing up and he goes,
Kenzie (Adam):
Why the fuck are you fighting it, bro? Just let it happen! Be it! Why are you so fucking scared of it ? it is you, right? That’s the whole point of this? Is that you are you and you are the wolf and they’re one in the same thing. So be it! Because while I don’t have the energy to fight this thing anymore, you’ve never had the balls to fucking be what you’re supposed to be.
Mads
I’m going to grab onto his shirt and pull him closer to me, bare my teeth like right up against his sternum.
Mads (Caleb):
It’s because I don’t have my brother here to fight with me. He’s always been here, Adam. He makes it so that I can get through things like this. And he’s not here anymore. ‘Cause I can’t do this alone.
Kenzie (MC):
His face is like twitching, like the expressions look like they’re stuck between two different things. And you see a shadow pass across one of his eyes and he kinda blinks and shakes his head and he’s like
Kenzie (Adam):
That’s because whenever I’m around you, this thing gets louder.
Mads
With my hands in his collar, I’m going to shake him once, twice, and say,
Mads (Caleb):
Well, then tell it to get out.
Mads
And on the third one, I’m going to head butt him.
Kenzie (MC):
Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. So roll for Lash Out Physically (laughs)
Mads
I think I have a plus two, I rolled a ten.
Kenzie (MC):
So, Adam is taking one point of damage.
As that crack sounds, your dad has grabbed by the shoulder and pulled you back and your mother has like wrapped her arms around your brother’s chest but it doesn’t really help the situation because the eyes completely cloud over with the dark inkiness and his mouth starts to curve up with a smile. And there’s a chuckle that is like the voice from the heart. When it was Adam but it wasn’t Adam. And he goes,
Kenzie (The Shadow):
(chuckles) I like seeing your true colors. You know what your brother thinks? He wants what you say to be true. But we all know its not. ‘Cause you’ve always wanted to be the center of attention and you’re too afraid now that you could be, to take it. I told you once before, I can help you. Potential and all of that. I don’t think you need to hear it again.
Mads
This whole time I’m taking in these big heaving breaths that almost sound like snarling and by teeth have elongated and my pupils have narrowed into pinpoint flecks and there’s this cracking of bone and like lingering scent of smoke that is starting to billow off of the sides of my face and I am trying so hard to keep it in that I’m piercing my nails – that have also elongated to like sharp points – into the meat of my hands. On an exhale, let out this really low rumble of a noise that kinda like reverberates inside of my chest. And it sounds like thunder crackling somewhere in the distance in a really large open field.
Mads (Caleb):
And I told you that I was going to get you out of my brother. Did you forget that? I can tell you again.
Kenzie (The Shadow):
I think one day you’ll come around.
Kenzie (MC):
And your brother kinda slumps in your mother’s arms and looks up and its him again.
Kenzie (Adam):
The deal was you. This thing just wanted you. And I was the next bet. And I was weak so I let it in. So, you can have it, but you have to let it in.
Kenzie (MC):
Your mom is like pulling Adam back, sitting him on his bed. And she stands between you, her hands out as if you were going to physically fight one another again.
Kenzie (Sharon):
There is obviously something, another consequence of the barrier being broken. I suspect there are things that we don’t know about. No one is doing anything drastic, Caleb, get that look off your face. No we’re not doing that.
Kenzie (MC):
Your dad says,
Kenzie (Daniel):
There is not really any possibility of me staying calm in this situation because that was absolutely terrifying. And, uh, (lets out deep breath), I know understand what you meant by it being in him, Caleb. Adam, why didn’t you tell us this before.
Kenzie (Adam):
What – what would have been a good way to do that, I guess, you know just… by the way, got sad one night, made a deal with something I know nothing about.
Kenzie (Daniel):
Yeah, I think it might have been better than just being possessed for three months.
Kenzie (Sharon):
Okay, everybody, settle down, okay? We will get to the bottom of this. We will ask questions. We will make amends with people that I thought we would never talk to ever again. And we will find answers. I think that the first person we should contact is Wyatt and the guardians because even if they don’t know what it is, they might know more about why it is.
Mads
Caleb groans so fucking loud. At this point like as this conversation has been progressing, the bones have snapped back into place I think is the best way to describe whatever it is that Caleb does. And the smoke is gone. The smell is gone. His teeth have returned to normal. His eyes have returned to normal. His nails have. Everything has – it’s like the fight got sucked out of him when the creature dissipated from Adam.
Kenzie (MC):
And then your mom looks past you to your dad and says,
Kenzie (Sharon):
Daniel, I love you but why I high heaven did I ever agree to marry into this family.
Kenzie (MC):
It is an evening after a school day. You are at home, in your room. Maybe working on homework, maybe procrastinating homework when you hear your mom call,
Kenzie (Ely Hook):
Sawyer! Can you come here please?
Brennan (Sawyer):
Yeah!
Brennan:
I’ll rush downstairs.
Kenzie (MC):
They are both standing, your mom and your dad, at the bottom of the staircase ready for you to appear.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Uh… hi.
Kenzie (William Hook):
Yeah, uh, hey, pal. We’ve got something else we need to show you.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Oooookay. You guys are acting really weird. Like formal weird.
Kenzie (Ely):
Uh, well, its not – its not formal, um, but it is like a big deal and its kinda like the last time your dad had to show you something like a long time ago. There’s something else that we need to disclose to you.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Okay.
Kenzie (MC):
Your dad kind of beckons you down the stairs.
Brennan (Sawyer):
What do we have like a nuclear bomb for Wildmoore?
Kenzie (William):
I mean…
Brennan (Sawyer):
What?
Kenzie (William):
No, not like physically nuclear bomb but I think metaphorically it could possibly have the same negative effects.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Okay…
Kenzie (William):
Listen, pal, I think after everything that happened over the weekend, this is something that we finally feel better trusting you with. Because you proved yourself to be for this family and you were ready to act if needed and that takes a lot of guts and we appreciate it and so I think its about time you know everything.
Brennan (Sawyer):
I kinda thought I knew a bunch. Does this have to do with like Wyatt? Like that everything? Like everything about everything or everything about –
Kenzie (William):
In a sense yes, but the more – the bigger issue right now is specifically, um, Ryan Bishop.
Kenzie (MC):
As your dad leads you into the back office, your mom joins you though this time. Its been many years but you have never asked your mom about learning anything even though it was something that you dad had almost urged you to do. And she hasn’t pushed. Hasn’t even said a thing to you about it. Your dad has always bene solution oriented while your mother has always been a little bit more understanding. And so while your dad probably would have dragged you downstairs to help, your mother never asked that of you, wanted that of you. You have seen her throughout the past through years, disappear into the backroom for hours. She’s never told you what she was doing. You never asked. But you know that what your dad told you about her spending a lot of time down there, was true. It was just not something that she was trying to push you into as much as he was.
But he opens the secret staircase and you single file your way down through the door into the greenhouse. And he leads you through all the plants into the back where there’s another door that the first time you were down there, he did not mentioned, didn’t really discus, didn’t lead you through. This one has an actual key that he slips into a lock and twists to open.
Brennan (Sawyer):
What no, uh, no handprints, no eye scanning.
Kenzie (MC):
William chuckles a bit.
Kenzie (William):
Its all a bit much but there has been the feeling of a need to update in the last few years. But if you can eye scan to get down here, then you probably have a key and that’s how its going to be.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Okay. Alright. Let’s go in.
Kenzie (MC):
So he keys open the lock. And all that’s in this room that the three of you walk into is – its small, uh there a desk, a couple chairs, a few file cabinets and that is it. And they don’t bother to shut the door behind you, there’s not going to be anyone else down here.
Brennan (Sawyer):
I was expecting a lot more. I guess just like a lot more.
Kenzie (Ely):
I mean, Sawyer, did you think we were going to have those like X-ray lines that you have to jump over or whatever.
Brennan (Sawyer):
I mean sorta. I was expecting an empty room except for one pedestal with a red button on it.
Kenzie (William):
I don’t think digitizing these files is a good way to go about things.
Brennan (Sawyer):
I don’t want a red button room! That’s scary. Let’s stick with the cabinets.
Kenzie (MC):
He says,
Kenzie (William):
We have been keeping tabs on the Moores and the Duncans from the beginning. This is not something that just you and your mother and I have been doing. This is something that has been done by the family, the Hook family, for generations. For as long as this place has began. I can’t imagine that they aren’t doing the same to us to be perfectly honestly. But, there have been some threads in the history of this town that have been irking us for some time. One, in particular, that I think this past weekend shed some light on. He pulls out another key and puts it into the lock on the cabinet drawer to unlock it. And as he’s doing so your mother says,
Kenzie (Ely):
We don’t think that Ryan Bishop is the first fatality, the first consequence of vampires living in Wildmoore.
Kenzie (MC):
And William sets one of the folders down on the table. Its not thick in any way at all, its almost humorously thin. But he kinda presses it towards you.
Brennan:
I’ll pull it in. is like there like a name system – a naming system on it?
Kenzie (MC):
Maybe there was in the cabinet. Its just like a manila folder and none of it – there’s not
writing on any of it.Brennan:
I’ll flip it open.
Kenzie (MC):
Its news clippings. And as you kinda look through it, its not just any news clippings but a few about several different individuals and as you kinda look at headlines, scan the pages, individuals who have been found dead, individuals who have been left unclaimed, individuals that no one seemed to know the story of but may have just been passing through the town.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Okay, um, so, what your like plan with all this?
Kenzie (William):
We think that Ryan Bishop can be added to this file because we think that the same thing happened to him that happened to these other people.
Kenzie (MC):
And as you’re looking through it, you see… its not a lot of people and its spread over many years. The first picture that comes up in this file is unrecognizable to you. The date on it is about twenty years ago, but there’s nothing outstanding about it. Its nothing you ever heard of before. The one before that, a few news clipping sin is a different picture. This one is almost about twenty years prior to the previous one. There is a picture of this person. Looks to be a young girl. It's a blurry photo. I think it was a photo that they tried not to necessarily promote because it was a litlte bit damaged but this was before newspapers stopped literally showing photos of dead bodies so this is obviously, um, a person who has perished. But there’s a white T-shirt, leather jacket. There looks to be headphones beside this individual. Short hair. The date on this is about early eighties. The one previous to this is even about twenty years prior. It’s a young boy, maybe eight years old. Almost looks like he’s dressed up like a Newsie. Got the hat, the suspenders and the breeches and then there seems to be an individual every or so twenty years that has died. Has been a vagrant, has been a vagabond, has been just somebody passing through that nobody has any connection to. And the case was never necessarily closed on what happened to these people.
Kenzie (William):
These clippings were handed down to me and were handed down to my father and his mother because there is something here that is relevant that we just can’t prove yet. But Ryan Bishop? He lived here, he was a citizen of Wildmoore, he had family here, he was established here. But he’s the only one out of all of these people with that type of life. And so, we think that he died under the same circumstances that the rest of these individuals died under. Brutally, out of nowhere, without any recompense for such actions.
Brennan (Sawyer):
So, you’re telling me that Wildmoore has a serial killer?
Kenzie (William):
I’m telling you that we believe Wildmoore – one of the founders is someone who has a history of murder on their plate. And I’m telling you this and we want you to know this because we think that Bast Duncan killed Ryan Bishop, which means we think that he also killed the people in this file. And I understand that this isn’t a lot of people over the time that this place has been established, but I don’t really think that matters. And we were hesitant to let you know of this because of your friendship with Caleb and with Ivy. And we’re not saying you aren’t – you don’t still have that. We aren’t saying that we are trying to impose on you stipulations to those relationships.
Kenzie (MC):
And your mother kinda cuts in and she goes,
Kenzie (Ely):
We – we wouldn’t want to stop you having friendships and relationships with people you want to have… but we just think that you should know all the information now because you’ve proven yourself open to such information. So its important that you know the things that we know. And its important that you make decisions knowing everything that we know.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Can you guys tell me like one thing truthfully? Do you hate the Duncans?
Kenzie (MC):
Your mom has a quizzical look on her face. And your dad almost says something immediately and its like he steels himself. Its like he’s checking himself before he speaks. And your mom starts before he does and she says,
Kenzie (Ely):
Sawyer, if we told you that our family had nothing bad in our past we would be lying. We aren’t trying to act like the history of the Hooks have been perfect. But the history of the Hooks has always been about self-preservation, not about aggression or the first to instigate anything. We’ve always been about just protecting our family. And neither the Duncans or the Moores have ever had the same instinct. And so while I don’t – I’ve spent time with these people, I’ve – I’ve had drinks with these people, we’ve spent holidays together. They’re not strangers to me. But sometimes, the things that they do and the choices that they make are strange
Kenzie (MC):
And your dad says,
Kenzie (William):
I don’t fear the Duncans in I think the way you’re asking me. I fear them because I think that they are above the law at this point.
Brennan (Sawyer):
You guys sound like politicians. I also – I wasn’t talking about if you were afraid of them. I was talking about if you hated them. I don’t think that Bast – I don’t know if he would do this. But I – do you guys – what like what’s your proof? Why – outside of you just have a general distaste?
Kenzie (MC):
Your dad kinda crosses his arms over his chest and he says,
Kenzie (William):
I’ve never considered a hatred for somebody. I’ve just gone along with how I feel about them in the moment. But if you’re asking if I hate them, if that’s the answer you need, then maybe I do. But that also means that I hate the Moores for the same reason.
Kenzie (MC):
And he goes into another cabinet that he unlcocks with a key. And he pulls out another file folder that is a little bit thicker. But this one isn’t full of newspaper clippings. This one is full of more of what looks like financial records that are almost incomprehensible to you. And he says,
Kenzie (William):
We created Wildmoore as a group of three families. But the distrust that we have found ourselves in the last few weeks isn’t new. It’s the same distrust that Bast and Gabriel had for our ancestors, for the Moore’s ancestors, and they in kind. There has been a running line of distrust in this town, between its founders, since the beginning. And its almost impossible to shake because it keeps on turning itself up as true. We don’t know exactly what happened with Sarah Moore and I wish I knew more but I don’t. because that is actually more concerning almost than whether Bast is going around killing innocent children. But if we knew exactly what was going on with the Moore family, we would be able to stop what was happening in Wildmoore right now. That’s what’s just out of reach.
Kenzie (MC):
And you mom chimes in and says,
Kenzie (Ely):
I was pretty good friends with Sarah Moore for a while actually and then there was a time where it felt like she had changed, become somebody different. And after that she was almost gone immediately and we never saw her again. And she became closed off and then all of a sudden she left the town. I’m not trying to sound like a politician, Sawyer, I’m trying to sound like your mother who is concerned for you and is just trying to let you know all of the information you need to know to be friends with the people that you’re friends with. That’s all. None of us – I don’t think me or your father are trying to tell you not to be friends with them. We just finally feel like you’re ready to be fully informed to make your own decisions. And maybe – maybe we won’t agree with them. But you’re still our son so we will do our best to help you through what those decision are.
Brennan:
I look at my dad when she says that.
Kenzie (MC):
I think it’s clear to you that your dad doesn’t feel the same way but is not about to voice that opinion. ‘Cause he knows that that opinion would piss off your mother, would ostracize you, and also, in the long run, isn’t how to fix this situation. But if he could tell you what he was thinking, it would not be that.
Brennan (Sawyer):
So, I can now finally make my own decisions. Even if you don’t agree.
Kenzie (Ely):
As long as it doesn’t involve your really bad drug issue that we’ve been dealing with. That’s non-negotiable. But we’re not going to tell you not to be friends with the people that you’ve been friends with your entire life because if that was the case, we wouldn’t have let you be friends with them in the first place.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Can I like look through these?
Kenzie (William):
Yeah, you have full availability to this now. I promise. I’m so sorry. I should not have shown you this when you were eight years old let alone – I’m sorry. We put so much on you when you were so young without any –
Brennan (Sawyer):
Can you – could you like maybe go upstairs?
Kenzie (MC):
He takes a deep breath and he looks at your mom and she almost imperceptible nods at him to listen to you.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Sorry, I’m not trying to be like – I’m not trying to be like mean.
Kenzie (MC):
And he says,
Kenzie (William):
Yeah, bud, uh, yeah.
Kenzie (MC):
And he leaves the room but your mom does not.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Are you not going?
Kenzie (Ely):
Oh, um, I was going to stay down here and do some work.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Okay.
Kenzie (MC):
She kinda come close to you and says,
Kenzie (Ely):
Sawyer, I don’t expect you to understand where me or your father were coming from in all of this but there was never going to be the perfect time to tell you any of this because its almost impossible to take in and we didn’t want to force any of that on you before you could take it. And I just want you to know that I think that learning about what we had down here to begin with, at the age that your father deemed necessary, was wrong. And its not that I’m trying to keep things from you for longer than you deserved, its that I don’t think you at eight years old could fully comprehend that. So, I’m sorry.
Kenzie (MC):
And she kinda pulls your head in and kisses you on the forehead. And says,
Kenzie (Ely):
If you need anyting, I’ll be outside.
Brennan (Sawyer):
You know, um, Ivy and Caleb have to deal with what they are and I gotta deal with this so at least I don’t feel left out… of the trauma? Anyways, I’m going to look at some stuff.
Kenzie (MC):
She smiles really sadly but there’s nothing else that she’s going to be able to say that’s going to fix that or change that. So, she nods at you and shuts the door as she leaves.
Brennan:
As soon as the door’s shut, I’m sliding the manilla envelopes aside. I’m going to ravage all of these, looking for any indications of that black sludge.
Kenzie (MC):
It takes you a little bit of time but there are some – the financial records that your dad put out about the Moore family doesn’t lead you astray necessarily. It just kinda leads you in a weird path to finding out some other things. And nothing necessarily matches a perfect description o the black sludge, but you see a moment in time, in probably – you find something from like the 1960s about how the Wildmoore public pool was closed because of some sort of contamination. It's since reopened because it is open now in present day but it was closed for a little bit of time. The year that that information is from is directly coinciding with the year of one of the bodies that was found without any solution to. Notes written in a old journal that don’t belong to your dad’s handwriting, your mom’s handwriting or any such of the sort but that are handwritten and its talking about how there’s some sort of belief that somebody might have brought something from the old continent to the new continent but no one knows what it is. They just feel its presence. And its kinda written in a vague way because there’s a fear of somebody finding these and reading these.
Brennan:
Did the murder photo of that year – was the location at the public pool or nearby it?
Kenzie (MC):
Uh it wasn’t at the pool itself and was nearby. I will say there was also an indication of the same sort of situation about the drinking water at the mine – the quarry – that became undrinkable for people and that also coincides with the image of the girl with the short hair and the leather jacket. But the rest of them don’t match up as perfectly as those two instances but its not out of the realm of possibility that they could be connected. And there is a trend amongst the Moore financial records that have downturns during the time that these incidence happen as well. Your family actually seems to be the only people not affected, at least financially or physically, by what is going on here. At least after what your dad told you about the suspicions about the Duncans because they also aren’t mentioned at any point in any of these things.
Brennan:
I’ll put everything away and I’ll walk outside.
Kenzie (MC):
Your mother is dressed in a white lab coat and she is standing in front of a table that has some beakers and the like on it. And as you walk out of the door, she looks up at you and stares at you for a moment, just like trying to take in your general feelings about it. But I’m not sure she can really read anything. And instead she says,
Kenzie (Ely):
I’m going to stay down here for a bit. Do some work. You are welcome to join me if you like.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Do I get my own set of keys?
Kenzie (Ely):
I will talk to your father about that because you should.
Brennan (Sawyer):
I think I should as well. Last thing, mom?
Kenzie (Ely):
Yeah.
Brennan (Sawyer):
You don’t know where Sarah went to, do you?
Kenzie (Ely):
I don’t. I promise you that I don’t. because if I did, I would like to know. I’ve been worried about her for a while. Because if I’m being perfectly honest, I didn’t think she just stopped answering out texts and our calls. When she didn’t answer, I thought something bad had happened. And so I think she left this place for a reason and I think after she left, something bad happened to her. I would say something to you that your father will not say to you. Caleb and Ivy should be your best friends. They should be the people you are closest with and I don’t mean that in a way that means that you should use them, I don’t. I meant that they are the only people in this town, along with you, that might be able to save it. And that’s terrible, because you are all so young. But I think that we are all passed the point of being able to reconcile out own beliefs with one another.
Brennan:
Sawyer’s like walking almost past her and towards the stairs.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Mom? I think my generation has sort of come to terms with the fact that we’re going to spend our lives making up for all of your guys’ fuck ups.
Kenzie (MC):
In the moment – in the split second before you turn around, she looks down at the table and you know that she is crying.
Brennan (Sawyer):
Listen.
Brennan:
And I’ll step towards her.
Brennan (Sawyer):
I don’t blame you. I don’t know if that helps. I, uh, we – we have like a weird relationship and I don’t mean bad. I mean we have a weird relationships because I’m like in high school and because you’re like a mom that actually cares about their kid. So your cool because of that but (sighs)
Kenzie (Ely):
Sawyer, I never expected you not to hate me when you were in high school. I hated my parents when I was in high school. I am upset at myself, not at you. I am upset at the way this entire thing turned out because I listened to somebody when I didn’t believe them. Your dad had ideas for how all this was going to go, how you were going to become. And I knew when you were so little that you were never going to become the things he wanted you to be. And it’s not that he’s upset about that, it’s just that he never learned to grow from that. ‘Cause your dad loves you, he just doesn’t understand that you’re not what he expected you to be. He still ahs that image in his mind. And because of that, all of this has been tossed on you, and it should not be like that. It shouldn’t.
Brennan (Sawyer):
You know, Mom, I don’t want to make you more upset, but there’s going to be a day where I’m done and – did you know I have dreams sometimes? Where I’m just punching dad in the face? I’m gonna go.
Kenzie (MC):
And as the door is shutting behind you, you just hear,
Kenzie (Ely):
I still love you.
Kenzie (MC):
And the door shuts.
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Meet your hosts:
Kenzie Tartaglione
Creator/Producer